Not the Transformer we wanted and yet; definitely the Transformer we deserved to get. G1 and Generations Wheelie!

See what I did there? Though perhaps you think I’m being less than fair.

How could we deserve to get, an update of Wheelie in this set?

There are so many more ‘bots, absolutely any of those; would be preferable to that kid that bopped Grimlock on the nose.

His rhyming, his voice, his toy in G1! These things were not things that remind us of fun.

In fact, from the movie, why Hot Rod is dismissed; as most hated, is because Wheelie does exist.

Hot Rod was indirectly responsible for the death of Optimus Prime! Yet, Wheelie is more hated because of the rhyme.

So let me explain my statement, ’cause I will not swerve; when I say Generations Wheelie is something we deserve.

Generations is a toyline that shouldn’t be. To say the least, it’s financially risky.

Transformers are toys, toys are meant for the kids; an on-going retail release with no cartoon could put Hasbro on the skids.

Hasbro doing these toys at all takes a lot of guts; despite this fact most of the fandom still struts;

around with attitudes; spewing ridiculous platitudes,

“There’s my Grimlock, where’s the rest? 1 out of 5 Dinobots? Surely you jest!”

“My toys have gotten smaller! Give me more and make them taller!”

“How dare you give me Kup! I wanted Ironhide too, one’s not enough!”

“I know Hasbro has no control over pricing, but why; Hasbro sucks, the toys cost too much, kthnxbye!”

“Combaticons are too neon, Bruticus shouldn’t be fab! Kids would definitely buy Onslaught in olive drab!”

Prefaced with “I wish” none of these statements are too bad; but more often than not they are spoken by the raving mad.

Half-crazed, entitled, little brats; the fandom dissolves into numerous spats.

That’s precisely why, month’s ago I said; I wish upon you a repaint with a new head,

Make him two shades of orange mixed with off-white; yes, I hope you get a deluxe Wheelie, that’s right.

And that’s exactly what we got. The thing that’s surprising is that he’s not– no. Wait. Stop. No more rhyming. I originally planned on writing this entire post in rhyme, but just attempting to read any of the TFWiki entry for Wheelie (completely written in rhyme) has made me think that’s more annoying than clever. I’ll stop while I’m ahead-ish. I sincerely hope the first part was not nearly as painful to read as it was to write.

The fandom has a lot of hate for Wheelie, even going so far as having him killed off in 3H’s Wreckers comic book’s first issue.

Having grown tired of the constant moaning about a toyline that by all rights shouldn’t even be possible, I felt that a release of one of their most despised G1 characters was nothing less than what the vitriolic whiners deserved.

When Generations Wheelie was first announced I quite literally let loose a loud “Mwahahahahahahahaha!” My curse upon the fandom had worked! Besides, I was perfectly ok with Wheelie because my most recent recollection of him was from the Transformers Headmasters series, in which he is not only not a rhyming savant, he’s actually kinda funny; especially in the episode where he has too much energon and gets drunk.

By the looks of it, I think his Autobot symbol is also drunk.

Then it was announced that the whole line was a Hasbro Asia exclusive and I was crestfallen. When it was announced that they would also hit Toys R Us as an exclusive, I was even more crestfallen. Trying to get your hands on a single Toys R Us exclusive these days is painful to say the least (I’m still looking for Masterpiece Optimus Prime); trying to get an entire line of deluxes is downright excruciating. That is, unless they decide to actually put the exclusives up on their website. Thanks to the useful “e-mail me when this item is available” function, I was able to sit back and let them tell me when I could order.

Wheelie is awesome. Never thought I’d ever type that particular sentence, but it’s true. Starting with my personal favourite mold of recent history, “Special Ops” Jazz, his paintjob perfectly evokes his G1 toy.

I keep his doors back to help attempt to differentiate him from the other four toys of this mold I own. Also, like any form of this toy that’s not Jazz, the speakers that come with him are put away. Jazz is the only one cool enough to pull off that look.

Truth be told, the only reason I own his G1 toy is that it came packed in with the 2005 Transformers Collection reissue of Kup and Recoil. There’s not much else about his G1 toy that influenced his new Generations incarnation. His new headsculpt is a combination of his original cartoon head and the head seen in a lot of his most recent comic book appearances.

His weapon of choice, the slingshot, also made a surprise appearance.

Some will try to say that the handle affixed to the side is so that it can be wielded as a gun as well. I reject that reality and submit that it is simply so the slingshot can still be stowed away under his hood. Mostly ’cause him holding it by the handle just looks solidly goofy.

The colour scheme does a good job of mimicking the orange with burnt orange highlights of the original.

Basically, a wish of ill upon the whinier portions of the fandom has actually been rendered into a pretty slick toy.

Of course, to play devil’s advocate for a moment, those that dislike him for the rhyming (a personality quirk resurrected in the bio of his Generations toy) potentially have a point. When I think of characters that speak in rhyme, one in particular jumps straight to mind, the Demon from DC Comics, Etrigan. In the DC Comics universe, rhyming is a sign of a demon’s higher rank amongst the other demons.

“No longer a pipsqueak’s form you take; your rhyming has promise, a fine demon you will make.”

Maybe Wheelie’s childlike, cheery disposition is a cover for more… insidious goals.


6 thoughts on “Not the Transformer we wanted and yet; definitely the Transformer we deserved to get. G1 and Generations Wheelie!

  1. Bravo! Great read. And by and large, I agree by and large with your points about the fandom. There are only a few forums and sites where I have patience enough to sort through the whine.

    I myself don’t mind Wheelie. While I’m not quite for him in that terrific Jazz mold, I’m more than satisfied with his Legends figure. I actually found him to be a pretty sympathetic and likable in that particular spotlight issue, thanks to its excellent artwork, survivalist storyline that hews closer to a serious take on his bio, as well as a reasonable-enough explanation of his rhyming.

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